Quote #28253
In weightlifting, I don’t think sudden, uncontrolled urination should automatically disqualify you.
Category Archives: Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
Quote #28254
I bet a funny thing about driving a car off a cliff is, while...
Quote #28255
Do you know what happens when you slice a golf ball in half Someone...
Quote #28256
You know what’s probably a good thing to hang on your porch in the...
Quote #28244
He was a cowboy, mister, and he loved the land. He loved it so...
Quote #28233
I think a cute movie idea would be about a parrot who is raised...
Quote #28234
Today I accidentally stepped on a snail on the sidewalk in front of our...
Quote #28235
My new millionaire idea is one regular shoe and one ‘swollen’ shoe, for when...
Quote #28236
I think somebody should come up with a way to breed a very large...
Quote #28237
I wish everybody would have to have an electric thing implanted in our heads...