Quote #28290
When people say that the desert is lifeless, it just makes me want to...
Category Archives: Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
Quote #28291
I wish there was a disease where you’re afraid of clouds, because I think...
Quote #28292
If you were a pirate, you know what would be the one thing that...
Quote #28293
If there was a big gardening convention, and you got up and gave a...
Quote #28282
The wise man can pick up a grain of sand and envision a whole...
Quote #28283
If I come back as a horsefly, I think my favorite thing would be...
Quote #28284
If you had a school for professional fireworks people, I don’t think you could...
Quote #28270
If I was a father in a waiting room, and the nurse came out...
Quote #28271
When you die, if you go somewhere where they ask you a bunch of...
Quote #28272
If you were a gladiator in olden days, I bet the inefficiency of how...