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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #13664

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If you ever reach total enlightenment while you’re drinking a beer, I bet it...
Richard Milhous Nixon

Quote #7261

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
There is a time to be timid. There is a time to be conciliatory....
Robert Morley

Quote #20897

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Anyone who works is a fool. I don’t work – I merely inflict myself...
George John Whyte-Melville

Quote #18965

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
In the choice of a horse and a wife, a man must please himself,...
Erma Bombeck

Quote #11023

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
A child develops individuality long before he develops taste. I have seen my kid...
Doug Larson

Quote #7448

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Few things are more satisfying than seeing your own children have teenagers of their...
Joseph Sobran

Quote #17601

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Politics is the conspiracy of the unproductive but organized against the productive but unorganized.
J & A Foundation

Quote #14446

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
A turtle with no legs tends not to go anywhere.
Walt Whitman

Quote #8321

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I no doubt deserved my enemies, but I don’t believe I deserved my friends.
Zelda

Quote #13015

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I don’t want to live. I want to love first, and live incidentally.
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