Quote #13868
I remember we were all horrified to see Grandpa up on the roof with...
Category Archives: Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
Quote #13884
If you’re an ant, and you’re walking along across the top of a cup...
Quote #13900
I think a good movie would be about a guy who’s a brain scientist,...
Quote #13916
If you want to be the popular one at a party, here’s a good...
Quote #13932
Whether they live in an igloo or a grass shack or a mud hut,...
Quote #13869
I think in one of my previous lives I was a mighty king, because...
Quote #13885
It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to...
Quote #13901
If you’re pretty happy, but you have a little Chihuahua that’s always biting you...
Quote #13917
You know how to paint a room real fast Just put paint rollers on...
Quote #13933
Blow ye winds, like the trumpet blows but without that noise. 00