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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #13779

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If I come back as a horsefly, I think my favorite thing would be...
James Barrie

Quote #2239

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
The printing press is either the greatest blessing or the greatest curse of modern...
Mark Twain

Quote #1608

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I’ve come loaded with statistics, for I’ve noticed that a man can’t prove anything...
Benjamin Franklin

Quote #3895

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Sin is not hurtful because it is forbidden, but it is forbidden because it’s...
Mohammed Daud Khan

Quote #14790

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I feel the happiest when I can light my American cigarettes with Soviet matches.
Richard Buckminster Fuller

Quote #7378

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it’s going to be a...
Walter Savage Landor

Quote #3106

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Ambition is but avarice on stilts and masked.
George Burns

Quote #7781

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
Henry Ward Beecher

Quote #2697

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Every young man would do well to remember that all successful business stands on...
Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Quote #6450

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Ferris Cameron has never been in love — at least, nobody’s ever been in...
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