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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #28138

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Here’s a good thing to do if you go to a party and you...
Alf Landon, during his speech in his presidential campaign against FDR

Quote #3669

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Wherever I have gone in this country, I have found Americans.
Ronald Reagan

Quote #23332

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
The Soviet Union would remain a one-party nation even if an opposition party were...
Oscar Fischinger

Quote #5118

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Everything in the world has a spirit which is released by its sound.
Henry Adams

Quote #24657

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Accident counts for much in companionship, as in marriage.
Henry Kissinger, New York Times, Oct. 28, 1973

Quote #7840

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a little longer.
Fran Lebowitz

Quote #10476

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I...
George Bernard Shaw

Quote #16732

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
A man never tells you anything until you contradict him.
Seneca, Letters to Lucilius V

Quote #10482

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Fear keeps pace with hope. Nor does their so moving together surprise me; both...
Henry Fielding

Quote #3022

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Make money your god and it will plague you like the devil.
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