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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #28341

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
I wish I had a dollar for every time I spent a dollar, because...
(Anon.)

Quote #19135

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Optimization hinders evolution.
William Shakespeare, "Twelfth Night", Act 3 scene 4

Quote #4902

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
If this were played upon a stage now, I could condemn it as an...
Tom Robbins

Quote #8502

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
There exists a false aristocracy based on family name, property, and inherited wealth. But...
George Carlin

Quote #8582

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are...
Laurence J. Peter

Quote #19501

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the...
Woodrow Wilson

Quote #9709

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
America lives in the heart of every man everywhere who wishes to find a...
Aristotle, Rhetoric

Quote #4454

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
A whole is that which has beginning, middle and end.
William Osler

Quote #20015

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
We are here to add what we can to life, not to get what...
Stephen William Hawking

Quote #28512

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
My goal is simple. It is the complete understanding of the Universe.
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