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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #13931

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If you had to list the different types of haircuts in order of how...
J. Hart

Quote #20505

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Fig Newton The force required to accelerate a fig 39.37 inches per sec.
Assyrian Proverb

Quote #16588

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
The hammer shatters glass but forges steel.
Ralph Kiner

Quote #14843

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
The Mets have gotten their leadoff batter on only once this inning.
George Bernard Shaw

Quote #408

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about...
Fran Lebowitz

Quote #8443

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater,...
John Fitzgerald Kennedy

Quote #5595

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
The goal of education is the advancement of knowledge and the dissemination of truth.
Dwight D Eisenhower

Quote #245

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Oh, that lovely title, ex-president.
James Barrie

Quote #2234

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
To die will be an awfully big adventure.
Walt Disney

Quote #7732

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If you can dream it, you can do it.
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