Quote #28159
If you’re an archaeologist, I bet it’s real embarrassing to put together a skull...
Category Archives: Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
Quote #28148
When you go ice-skating, try not to swing your arms too much, because that...
Quote #28149
If you’re a cowboy, and you’re dragging a guy behind your horse, I bet...
Quote #28150
If I ever do a book on the Amazon, I hope I am able...
Quote #28151
If you ever crawl inside an old hollow log and go to sleep, and...
Quote #28152
What is it that makes a complete stranger dive into an icy river to...
Quote #28153
I think that a hat which has a little cannon that fires and then...
Quote #28154
If you’re in a boxing match, try not to let the other guy’s glove...
Quote #28155
I hope that after I die, people will say of me ‘That guy sure...
Quote #28156
If God dwells inside us, like some people say, I sure hope He likes...