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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #13673

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Can’t the Marx Brothers be arrested and maybe even tortured for all the confusion...
William Osler

Quote #4262

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Look wise, say nothing, and grunt. Speech was given to conceal thought.
James Earl Jimmy Carter, Jr.

Quote #11673

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I personally think that he did violate the law, that he committed impeachable offenses....
Gloria Pitzer

Quote #21034

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age.
David McClure Brinkley

Quote #11232

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks...
Paula Poundstone

Quote #21150

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I don’t have a bank account, because I don’t know my mother’s maiden name.
Margaret Hilda Thatcher

Quote #17970

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If you want something said, ask a man if you want something done, ask...
Colley Cibber

Quote #11970

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
We shall find no fiend in hell can match the fury of a disappointed...
John A. Wheeler

Quote #21742

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If you haven’t found something strange during the day, it hasn’t been much of...
Sankara

Quote #17290

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
The spirit is smothered, as it were, by ignorance, but so soon as ignorance...
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