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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #13826

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If you’re a young Mafia gangster out on your first date, I bet it’s...
Richard F. Lovelace

Quote #15261

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
The goal of revival is conformity to the image of Christ, not imitation of...
Harry S Truman

Quote #3031

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If you tell Congress everything about the world situation, they get hysterical. If you...
Solomon Short

Quote #17501

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Nature abhors a hero. For one thing, he violates the law of conservation of...
Eubie

Quote #10931

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Never trust anyone who wants what you’ve got. Friend or no, envy is an...
Signs

Quote #3943

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Merrill Morgan, this crop stuff is just about a bunch of nerds who never...
Laurence J. Peter

Quote #3633

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.
H. G. Wells

Quote #18851

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
After people have repeated a phrase a great number of times, they begin to...
Hellen Keller

Quote #5990

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature…. Life is either...
Sir William Joseph Slim

Quote #17559

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
There is only one principle of war and that’s this. Hit the other fellow,...
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