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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #13630

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I remember how my Great Uncle Jerry would sit on the porch and whittle...
Jerry Coleman

Quote #12061

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
The new Haitian baseball can’t weigh more than four ounces or less than five.
Benjamin Disraeli

Quote #2976

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Man is a being born to believe. And if no church comes forward with...
Albert Einstein

Quote #9329

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If A equals success, then the formula is A equals X plus Y plus...
Danish proverb

Quote #7185

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Drink nothing without seeing it Sign nothing without reading it.
Ilie Nastase

Quote #15962

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
My ambition is to do a good job. I never plan anything. (running for...
Robert Montgomery

Quote #15805

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If you achieve success, you will get applause, and if you get applause, you...
Dazed and Confused

Quote #3022

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Pink All I’m saying is that if I ever start referring to these as...
G. C. Lichtenberg

Quote #4474

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents.
Jeremy Bernstein

Quote #10721

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Never speak more clearly than you think.
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