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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #13903

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Something tells me that the first mousetrap wasn’t designed to catch mice at all,...
Menander

Quote #15643

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Whom the gods love dies young.
Al Capone

Quote #11589

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
My rackets are run on strictly American lines and they’re going to stay that...
Richard Milhous Nixon

Quote #7231

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Rarely have so many people been so wrong about so much.
Beth Knight

Quote #14888

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Figures won’t lie, but liars can figure.
Edward Shepherd Mead

Quote #20808

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Not even computers will replace committees, because committees buy computers.
Sebastien-Roch Nicolas

Quote #20976

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If you must love your neighbor as yourself, it is at least as fair...
Earl Nightingale

Quote #16096

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Success is the progressive realization of a worthy goal or ideal.
Joe Moore

Quote #15838

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
You can’t trust a promise someone makes while they’re drunk, in love, hungry, or...
Ambrose Bierce

Quote #4168

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
The covers of this book are too far apart.
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