Quote #2344
Thank God kids never mean well
Quote #25946
I’m very curious to know what the hell they’re saying on the phone, but...
Quote #5565
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.
Quote #10535
Our constitution works. Our great republic is a government of laws, not of men.
Quote #82
It is a common delusion that you make things better by talking about them.
Quote #27181
The lover says How beautiful you are, now that you love me.
Quote #16142
No one is safe from slander. The best way is to pay no attention...
Quote #27342
Perhaps the mission of those who love mankind is to make people laugh at...
Quote #9957
Ya know, if you treat every comic the way you treated me tonight, You...
Quote #29040
History is a nightmare from which we are trying to awaken.