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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #28379

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
If the captain invited me to his party, after he had whipped me earlier...
W. Somerset Maugham

Quote #23716

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Life isn’t long enough for love and art.
Heinrich Heine

Quote #28550

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
The German is like the slave who, without chains, obeys his masters merest word,...
(Anon.)

Quote #19218

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
General Failure’s Fault. Not Yours.
Arthur Schopenhauer

Quote #3978

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
If we were not all so interested in ourselves, life would be so uninteresting...
John Fitzgerald Kennedy

Quote #21124

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Like dealing with Dad-all give and no take. (On negotiating with Soviet Premier Nikita...
William Shakespeare

Quote #20917

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
O, woe is me, To have seen what I have seen, see what I...
Christopher Morley

Quote #1768

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated, but not signed.
Yukio Mishima

Quote #30041

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
If we value so highly the dignity of life, how can we not also...
John Blake

Quote #6124

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
The world tolerates conceit from those who are successful, but not from anybody else.
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