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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #28376

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
If aliens from outer space ever come and we show them our civilization and...
Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant

Quote #10896

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear...
Virgil

Quote #6467

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Happy is he who gets to know the reasons for things.
Ronald Reagan

Quote #23329

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
We seek a constitutional amendment to permit voluntary school prayer. God should never have...
Socrates

Quote #17184

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
I thought to myself, ‘I am wiser than this man neither of us knows...
Marcus Tullius Cicero

Quote #22314

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
The countenance is the portrait of the soul, and the eyes mark its intentions.
Euripides, Phoenix

Quote #4355

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Every man is like the company he is wont to keep.
Publilius Syrus

Quote #20046

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Do not despise the bottom rungs in the ascent to greatness.
James Barrie

Quote #18302

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
The life of every man is a diary in which he means to write...
Plautus

Quote #24406

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
‘He means well’ is useless unless he does well.
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