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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #28421

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
You know how to paint a room real fast Just put paint rollers on...
Mark Twain

Quote #11924

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
I have never examined the subject of humor until now. I am surprised to...
William Hazlitt

Quote #24095

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Those who can command themselves command others.
Elsa Maxwell

Quote #29850

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Laugh at yourself first, before anyone else can.
Andrew Alden

Quote #24801

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Before speaking, consider the interpretation of your words as well as their intent.
Ernest Gaines

Quote #11641

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men...
Horace, Epistles

Quote #4558

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
He wins every hand who mingles profit with pleasure.
Joyce

Quote #26018

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Listening, not imitation, may be the sincerest form of flattery.
Pearl Bailey

Quote #22001

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
We must change in order to survive.
William J. Clinton

Quote #20173

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
I tried marijuana once. I did not inhale.
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