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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #13711

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
If you wear a toupee, why not let your friends try it on for...
Woody Allen

Quote #2264

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick — not...
Swordfish

Quote #6522

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Gabriel Well…life is stranger than fiction sometimes.
Marcus Aurelius Antoninus

Quote #10110

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
This Being of mine, whatever it really is, consists of a little flesh, a...
Emile Coue

Quote #12163

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
When the imagination and will power are in conflict, are antagonistic, it is always...
Susan Partnow

Quote #21060

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
It is within the families themselves where peace can begin.
Brenda Ueland

Quote #18181

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
So you see, imagination needs moodling – long, inefficient, happy idling, dawdling and puttering.
William Shakespeare

Quote #5242

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
All the world’s a stage,And all the men and women merely players.They have their...
Thomas Jefferson

Quote #8051

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
When angry, count ten before you speak if very angry, an hundred.
Herbert Spencer

Quote #17647

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Opinion is ultimately determined by the feelings, and not by the intellect.
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