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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #13908

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I don’t say that the bird is ‘good’ or the bat is ‘bad.’ But...
Francis William Bourdillon

Quote #11130

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Whenever you want to marry someone, go have lunch with his ex-wife.
Robert Benchley

Quote #1399

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.
Albert Einstein

Quote #9384

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I have become rather like King Midas, except that everything turns not into gold...
Greg Norman

Quote #16120

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I’m disappointed, but I’m not going to run around like Dennis Rodman and head-butt...
Unknown

Quote #18240

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I would rather reach for the stars, Then at least I know That I...
Richard Ingrams

Quote #14433

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
It’s important for people not to hold a high opinion of politicians, and one...
Jeff Melvoin

Quote #20926

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
You’re confusing product with process. Most people, when they criticize, whether they like it...
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Quote #668

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I used to always think that I’d look back on us crying and laugh,...
Unknown

Quote #18418

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
He was a true friend, he stabbed me in the front.
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