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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #13731

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
My new millionaire idea is one regular shoe and one ‘swollen’ shoe, for when...
Anon.

Quote #3233

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Cannot find REALITY.SYS…Universe Halted.
Trey and Matt Stone Parker

Quote #21133

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I think that parents only get so offended by television because they rely on...
Laertius Diogenes

Quote #12612

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
‘Bury me on my face,’ said Diogenes and when he was asked why, he...
Mark Twain

Quote #1636

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Don’t part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but...
Marcus Aurelius Antoninus

Quote #10137

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
You will find rest from vain fancies if you perform every act in life...
Richard Milhous Nixon

Quote #7217

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Once you get into this great stream of history, you can’t get out.
James Madison

Quote #15371

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
What spectacle can be more edifying or more seasonable than that of Liberty and...
Mary McLeod Bethune

Quote #10788

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
Faith is the first factor in a life devoted to service. Without it, nothing...
Ronald Reagan

Quote #8192

Author admin Date November 1, 2013
I just don’t think it’s good for us to be run out of town....
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