Quote #13858
The other day I got out my can opener and was opening a can...
Category Archives: Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
Quote #13779
If I come back as a horsefly, I think my favorite thing would be...
Quote #13795
People laugh when I say that I think a jellyfish is one of the...
Quote #13811
It makes me mad when I go to all the trouble of having Marta...
Quote #13827
A funny thing is if you’re out hiking and your friend gets bit by...
Quote #13843
I think a good novel would be where a bunch of men on a...
Quote #13859
What am I afraid of I’ll tell you a feather. that’s right, a feather....
Quote #13780
If you had a school for professional fireworks people, I don’t think you could...
Quote #13796
Like jewels in a crown, the precious stones glittered in the queen’s round metal...
Quote #13812
People just naturally assume that dogs would be incapable of working together on some...