Quote #1045
The trouble with our times is that the future is not what it used...
Quote #28306
If you were a poor Indian with no weapons, and a bunch of conquistadores...
Quote #2559
I hate women because they always know where things are.
Quote #19683
We must all hang together, or most assuredly we shall all hang separately.
Quote #1444
Illusions are art, for the feeling person, and it is by art that you...
Quote #9873
Ya know, if you treated every comic the way you treated me tonight. You...
Quote #5823
When we are angry or depressed in our creativity, we have misplaced our power....
Quote #29696
There are four things that hold back human progress. Ignorance, stupidity, committees and accountants.
Quote #27285
People say I’ve had brushes with the law. That’s not true. I’ve had brushes...
Quote #26951
Man is descended from a hairy, tailed quadruped, probably arboreal in its habits.