Quote #8894
Every time we remember to say “thank you,” we experience nothing less than heaven...
Quote #9873
Ya know, if you treated every comic the way you treated me tonight. You...
Quote #5113
If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because...
Quote #7219
If you would be wealthy, think of saving as well as getting.
Quote #27030
A great country worthy of the name does not have any friends.
Quote #26306
Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the...
Quote #23922
Confessed faults are half mended.
Quote #24576
An artist is a dreamer consenting to dream of the actual world.
Quote #23949
A camel is a horse designed by committee.
Quote #13080
Fear is a great motivator.