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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #28415

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Instead of having ‘answers’ on a math test, they should just call them ‘impressions,’...
Dan Quayle, 9/5/90

Quote #14496

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
For NASA, space is still a high priority.
Winston Churchill

Quote #10775

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into...
Carol Burnett

Quote #26157

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
When someone who is known for being comedic does something straight, it’ s always...
Marjorie Holmes

Quote #28732

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
What feeling is so nice as a child’s hand in yours So small, so...
Confucius

Quote #17475

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.
Henry Kissinger

Quote #19370

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Nobody will ever win the Battle of the Sexes. There’s just too much fraternizing...
Ellen DeGeneres

Quote #33755

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
I was coming home from kindergarten–well they told me it was kindergarten. I found...
Henry Louis Mencken

Quote #29961

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Love is the triump of imagination over intelligence.
Dale Dauten, from a 1997 column

Quote #5203

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Nothing important can be taught, only learned.
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