Quote #1172
When ideas fail, words come in very handy.
Quote #3417
I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
Quote #6418
Civilization is the progress toward a society of privacy. The savage’s whole existence is...
Quote #16530
Let us be grateful to people who make us happy They are the charming...
Quote #15064
I do not like this word bomb. It is not a bomb it is...
Quote #9910
There is no pain so great as the memory of joy in present grief.
Quote #10768
My way of joking is to tell the truth. It’s the funniest joke in...
Quote #4754
Not that the story need be long, but it will take a long while...
Quote #11494
The Congress will push me to raise taxes, and I’ll say no, and they’ll...
Quote #1591
Behold, the fool saith, Put not all thine eggs in the one basket, —...