Quote #9957
Ya know, if you treat every comic the way you treated me tonight, You...
Quote #25442
We don’t need more assault rifles on our streets right now.
Quote #22232
Perl – The only language that looks the same before and after RSA encryption.
Quote #7675
The man who has received a benefit ought always to remember it, but he...
Quote #29628
If you can’t say anything good about someone, sit right here by me.
Quote #3272
George Bush taking credit for the Berlin Wall coming down is like the rooster...
Quote #33561
Envy can be a positive motivator. Let it inspire you to work harder for...
Quote #5541
Fix it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without.
Quote #24757
In every child who is born, no matter what circumstances, and of no matter...
Quote #29762
Be ashamed to die unless you have won some victory for humanity.