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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

Quote #28433

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
I think Superman and Santa Claus are actually the same guy, and I’ll tell...
Gertrude Stein

Quote #31843

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
You are so afraid of losing your moral sense that you are not willing...
Jane Wagner

Quote #32696

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it.
Peter Fitzgerald

Quote #27563

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
You are perhaps the most accomplished confidence man since Charles Ponzi. I’d say you...
Marion Hammer

Quote #28442

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
A lot of children know absolutely nothing about guns other than what they see...
George Bernard Shaw

Quote #1824

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Democracy: The substitution of election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt...
Tallulah Bankhead

Quote #25254

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
They used to photograph Shirley Temple through gauze. They should photograph me through linoleum.
Ausonius

Quote #5207

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
If you are a terror to many, then beware of many.
Jules Renard

Quote #12710

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Failure is not the only punishment for laziness; there is also the success of...
Aristotle

Quote #17940

Author admin Date October 28, 2013
Man is by nature a political animal.
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