Quote #30089
There never were, in the world, two opinions alike, no more than two hairs,...
Quote #12917
If you look after the pennies, the dollars will look after themselves.
Quote #24676
If I had to choose between putting a saloon or a liberal church on...
Quote #3158
Fame lost its appeal for me when I went into a public restroom and...
Quote #276
I take a simple view of life: keep your eyes open and get on...
Quote #10440
Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.
Quote #34056
Never bear more than one trouble at a time. Some people bear three kinds...
Quote #33606
Whom did it benefit.
Quote #12625
Change is the law of life; and those who look only to the past...
Quote #32789
I try to make everyone’s day just a little more surreal.